Tuesday, November 14, 2006

A Joint Max Kuehn/Jason Houle Venture

When I think of my credit union, I think of many things.

I think of its fantastic achievements nationwide and its important contributions in my own community.

I think of its wise, powerful elders and their unerring judgment on the many vital matters which they must weigh each day.

When I think of my credit union I think of opportunity, a chance to succeed, a sliver of hope in an unrelentingly dark world.

When I think of my credit union I think of the noble farmers who strove to maintain their way of life in an increasingly impersonal, mechanized society, and the banks who did their best to help them.

When I think of my credit union I think of Jesus Christ blessing the money changers in the temple for their role in efficiently financing the peoples of ancient Jerusalem.

When I think of my credit union I think of a snowy wood by moonlight.

When I think of my credit union I glimpse the Godhead.

To paraphrase John F. Kennedy: Ask not what your bank can do for you, but what you can do for your bank. A bank is not merely a place of business where one can exchange money for goods and services (primarily services involving money itself); no, it is something much more. It is a modern day meeting house, a temple to fiscal stability, a place to ponder life’s big questions and search for truths within yourself. It is also a place where you can store money, earn money, lose money, see money, smell money, and hear money. But NOT print money. That's not what a bank is. That's called a mint. No, bank is like a great 3-ring circus of money, where a young man can go to watch the mighty strongmen and the graceful trapeze artists perform feats of fiscal wonder. Later, once he is of age, if he studied well as a lad, that same young man can go on to become the king of the clown parade in a monetary circus of his own.

No matter what kind of trouble I get into, I know my credit union will be there to bail me out. It is my sword and my shield, my helmet and my poniard*. In my thrusting, furrowing quest for greatness, I know my credit union will be a strong, trusty lance.

*A poniard is a form of dagger with a slim square or triangular blade. It was primarily used for stabbing in close quarters or in conjunction with a rapier**.

** A rapier is a relatively slender, sharply pointed sword, used mainly for thrusting attacks, developed in Europe around the 16th century. Although used on the battlefield, the rapier’s main place was at the side of the civilian gentleman and nobleman, just like a credit union. It was often used in conjunction with the poniard*.



At 10:36 PM, November 14, 2006, Blogger mayah said...

submit it. i dare you.

At 10:42 PM, November 14, 2006, Blogger Tara said...

umm EVERYONE WHO CONTRIBUTES ON THIE BLOG needs to go read my latest post. it's entitled "HEY YOU! MUSTACHES!" just so you don't miss it.

At 10:46 PM, November 14, 2006, Blogger Houley said...

We should cowrite more essays, Max.

At 10:55 PM, November 14, 2006, Blogger hannah said...


At 12:10 PM, November 15, 2006, Blogger Tom said...

yeah thats good stuff.

At 1:52 PM, November 15, 2006, Blogger m_kummet said...

max do you belong/ have you ever been in a credit union?

At 5:54 PM, November 15, 2006, Blogger constant_k said...

No, but I am a communist.

At 6:35 PM, November 15, 2006, Anonymous Anonymous said...



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