Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Sausage Fest?!?!


With the bread party just on the horizon, Josh Johnson has come up with a rival celebration. When first hearing his idea it may sound like possibly the most homosexual thing discussed on this blog since Bundy's "gaybos" and the frightening German mustache site.

The 2006 Chuck Norris Sausage Fest.



Now that you have all jumped to homo-erotic conclusions, I'll briefly explain this terrifying event. The whole thing budded from my original idea to have a Chuck Norris movie festival and show 4 strait Chuck Norris movies to see if anyone could survive. Of course when I mentioned this idea to Johnson he immediately thought of the most disturbing thing possible and got the idea to make it a "sausage fest", The actual event is, not quite, as disturbing as the title implies, according to my sources, there will be 5 strait Norris movies and everyone in attendance will bring some form of summer sausage, salami, or kielbasa, making it a sausage fest.

I'm am not encouraging or discouraging this event, only warning the masses of Josh Johnson's fightening plans. So if you see him in the hall follow these simple steps to safety:

1) Avoid making eye contact. This may encourage him to talk to you an invite you to his festival of sausages

2) If he does approach you, quickly turn the other way and pretend you never saw him.

3) If this still doesn't work, then you'll need to resort to plan B -- Kick him in the shin and run. If you have the chance, tell him to get a job and lay off the porno references.

The bread party will clearly be superior to the sausage fest and I assure you that I have no part in planning or hosting the Sausage festival.

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2 Comments:

At 8:13 PM, March 29, 2006, Blogger constant_k said...

I wouldn't reccomend kicking johnson in the shin. You WILL lose in a shin-kicking contest with this kid, trust me. Don't challenge him in bloody knuckles, either.

 
At 8:42 PM, March 29, 2006, Blogger Sherlock said...

He cheats at bloody knuckles. You could put your hands behind your back, and he'd still reach for 'em.

 

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