Tuesday, May 23, 2006

I've Reached The Sneaking Point

God closing the door: Five band officers were announced today, and I wasn't any of them. Weaksauce, man, friggin weaksauce. Andrew Kubas as president is fine by me, though; I'm going to learn to play "Hail To The Chief" and f0llow him around with a valve trombone. Also, every day before band I'll walk into the band room and say "Mr. Melby, the President of the Symphonic Band!"

God opening the window: as the tennis banquet drew to a close, I assisted in snagging three freshmen for a ceremonial lake dunking. When one squirmed away and hopped into the shallows to make his getaway, I heroically (if I do say so myself) leapt from the dock, wrapped him up, and took him down with me into the water. Afterwards, new tennis captain Bundy appointed me enforcer for next year. Oh man, I'm going to go so Solid Snake on those little freshmen. My motto: Watch your back!

In video game news: Right now, I'm thinking Metal Gear Solid has overtaken Halo as my favorite virtual reality franchise. This is probably mostly due to the fact that I have yet to thoroughly play the living hell out of Metal Gear (something I cannot say for Halo), but I think there are more subtle factors influencing this change of hands. As badass as Master Chief is, he's sort of distant and untouchable; his constant frontal assaults are fine for a super-soldier, but tend to be a little harder on mere humans during reenactments. Solid Snake, on the other hand, manages to be utterly hardcore while also remaining within human bounds. Master Chief needs an energy shield and an array of weaponary to fight his war; Snake just needs a light touch and good timing. In conclusion, Solid Snake is my new hero. I'm going to be wearing a lot more black stocking caps and peeking around every corner I come to. Halo 3 might turn me around, but for now (as mentioned earlier): Watch your back!

P.S.:I'm thinking we need a copy of this Onion article framed at Lost Lake Lodge (my workplace). Best line: "I understand they're only human, and humans, especially women, make mistakes."

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At 9:52 PM, May 23, 2006, Blogger keuber said...

what the M? (thanks carmen)

you didn't get officer?

who ARE the officers...don't even say WHO i think you're gonna...

At 10:23 PM, May 24, 2006, Blogger constant_k said...

Oh Kubas, I'm sorry...

In descending order:
Andrew Kubas
Abbey Ahlberg
Nina Belfiori
Alicia Neimi
Kevin Mortenson


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