Monday, April 10, 2006

Baby You're Much Too Fast

Down the road from my house there is a small used-car lot that seems to be going out of business. Each week they have fewer and fewer cars. There is one car, however, that, against all odds, never seems to sell. I am speaking, of course, about the silver Dodge Grand Caravan with terrifying bat demon graphics on the hood. (see below)

This may seem silly to you at first. Why in the world would someone not want this car? Lots of people want safe, reliable minivans, and just as many want a car with bitchin’ bat demon graphics. But as large as these two interest groups are, there is very little overlap between them (see diagram below).

Why has this car not yet sold? Because I have yet to make an offer. Clearly, this van was predestined to come to me and only to me. Who else besides God would know to put that particular van, with those singularly effervescent images, in the one car lot where the one interested person, me, would be certain to see it? Nobody, that’s who. It is…my destiny.

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8 Comments:

At 12:35 AM, April 11, 2006, Blogger mayah said...

i dont' understand why you don't already own it, really. get on that.

 
At 9:10 AM, April 11, 2006, Blogger Tom said...

thats the funniest goddamn thing ive seen in a long time. nice work.

 
At 1:46 PM, April 11, 2006, Blogger cameron said...

please buy it max please!

 
At 6:51 PM, April 11, 2006, Blogger royalewithcheese_ said...

What the Hell were they thinking when the owner decided to pay for a paint job like that on a Mini-Van

 
At 9:54 PM, April 11, 2006, Blogger Sherlock said...

you should put some sweet rims on it. i'm thinkin' 24's.

Spinners.

Or you could get those nickle-plated plastice ones like jeff got from fleet farm

 
At 9:59 PM, April 11, 2006, Blogger Johnny V said...

Thats a god damn nice car.

 
At 10:03 PM, April 11, 2006, Blogger keuber said...

i think it needs a 6 foot scratch on the hood to really accent the "ghettoness."

 
At 9:20 PM, April 17, 2006, Blogger hannah said...

better act fast.
we burchills are in the market for a new car, you know.

 

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