Thursday, July 27, 2006

One Nation Under A Very Specific God

There are a bunch of Mormons staying at Lost Lake Lodge, the resort where I work. They seem to have only one wife per man, but I guess it's possible (likely, really) thateach man just took his favorite wife and left the rest at home. They certainly seem to have brought all the kids, though, as they do have about 15 children for 6 adults.

So, Mormons are crazy and all, but that's not the point of this story. I was seating some other table, and I couldn't help but overhear one of the excessively well-groomed young men in a striped polo shirt say "So God sent Jesus Christ, his only son, down to earth to die for our sins. But it turns out that he only died for a select few people..."

I was a bit confused; was he explaining scripture to a bunch of Mormons? But it all became clear as he continued. "Only 122,000 people were saved and are going to heaven." The table erupted with laughter.

The Mormons were making fun of Jehova's Witnesses for having such a crazy religion. Mormons were doing this.


Good times. Oh, and has anyone else heard that Prince is a Jehova's Witness now? I wasn't sure at first, but now it seems like to sort of thing he would do, just to be different.

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At 2:41 PM, July 27, 2006, Blogger Sherlock said...

i'm pretty sure it's 144,000 people, 144 being a gross, and square the number of the tribes of Israel (12).

At 2:43 PM, July 27, 2006, Blogger constant_k said...

Mmmm, that makes sense in a totally whacked out sort of way.

At 2:54 PM, July 27, 2006, Blogger Samwalkertron said...

To be fair, Mormons are somewhat less crazy than Jehovah's Witnesses.

At 3:53 PM, July 27, 2006, Blogger Amelia said...

he is a jehovah's witness. i recently had to prove this to a bunch of friends. this is why he no longer swears and is clean in his lyrics. clean is relative here. we are talking about prince after all

crazy, right. a religion based on the mispronunciation of yahweh!

At 9:02 PM, July 27, 2006, Blogger Amelia said...

oh yeah, in today's Cj she openly speaks of his jehovah's witness status

At 9:31 PM, July 27, 2006, Blogger keuber said...

mi padre is correct.


and mormons are really friendly. and clean.

At 10:34 PM, July 27, 2006, Blogger jobble said...

clean? I heard mormons don't shower

At 10:46 PM, July 27, 2006, Blogger Sherlock said...

oh, it makes more sense because in the book of Revelations it speaks of 144,000 witnesses to the Apocalypse, but it's all related. Revelations are pretty much just the visions of a crazy guy much later than the rest of the New Testament.

At 10:50 PM, July 27, 2006, Blogger Sherlock said...

Totally unrelated, but Lance of N'Sync came out of the closet.

At 12:18 AM, July 28, 2006, Blogger Houley said...

Our very own Shane Penoyer is a Jehovah's Witness.

I thought polygamy was now outlawed in Mormonism. You can check me on that.

At 12:30 AM, July 28, 2006, Blogger hannah said...

polygamy is outlawed in mormonism - it was actually never officially endorsed by the church, although it was encouraged. there are a few sects (ie: cults) that follow mormon "tradition" and take multiple wives, however.

one time after the mormons at dinner they all went into the library and had a sing along to "america the beautful" and as they were singing the sky began to clear of storm clouds and sunlight started to shine through and it was pretty magestic.

also, they were planning on taking our pontoons out in the dark to launch fireworks off of them. yep, no burning ban, resort regulations or, you know, common sense will stop the mormons from ripping into the resort and burning the place down.

there a really super jewish family there now. in the one night they've been there i heard about their synagog, their daughter who studied in isreal and general finicky dining goodness. they're awesome. the abramsons. holla.

At 1:33 PM, July 28, 2006, Blogger keuber said...


when are you/me/carmen doing something?

At 1:08 PM, July 29, 2006, Blogger Houley said...

do the abramsons require different dishes and things? I've heard stories about hardcore Jewish families having "gentile plates" for visitors.


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