Jackson Bollocks

I'd like to go camping with some
fellow Northwestern freshmen before we start classes,
so I figured I'd sign up for Project
 Wildcat, an NU program which provides just such a service.
When I went to the website, however, I discovered
that I could not simply sign up and be done with it
--I had to fill out an application.
Oh, the injustice.

I'm not to worried though. With answers like these,
how could they refuse me?


[Q] What ingredient would you be in a sandwich and why?

[A] I would be smoked turkey, because I'm lean, pink,
and composed almost entirely of carbon.


[Q] What is your favorite joke?

[A] Q: What do worms eat before dinner? A: h'ordirts


[Q] Describe your favorite place in the world.

[A] My favorite place in the world is my home.
It's big and old and creaky, full of history and
bats.
My family also lives there, which, for me at least,
is another major benefit.
 It has a
central location...in my heart.


P.S.: As far as I can remember, I totally
made that worms joke up when I was in like 3rd grade.