it's not rape if you want it

man, i've been getting smoked lately.

bundy and i were tragically raped at the "PBO." total waste of representation.

the next 6 days:

meyers: 21 hours
elks booth: freakin' 32 hours

6 more days of meyers? could it be? praise god i'm almost out of there. ehhh no more.

Worth At Least 700 Words

Here's a metphorical recreation of the events of July 28th, 2006 in Brainerd, MN.

Oh man, dig the definition on those pecs.

Holy Shit

Our class-song conundrum is solved:

Toolmaster of Brainerd.

Basically the only song written about Brainerd, ever, and an awesome song to boot: what could be better.

Prong?

First: the treasure hunt was great fun. It was extremely warm, but we few and proud of team Doctor Octopus kept rolling for nearly the duration of the hunt, and so beat the heat to a certain extent. I feel the pain of teams that had major hang-ups, both mental (stumper clues) and physical (sand traps). The music clues were clever, although Tay's post-clue "driving music" left a lot to be desired (Pirates of the Caribbean, anyone?). I liked the riddle clues more than the word-puzzle clues. A letter scramble can be fun, but 4 or 5? No thanks.

That said, I give this hunt a big thumbs up, with a hearty well done for Tay and Jason. You certainly explored the idea of a hunt with a greatly expanded scope and did it very well. The weather and some outstanding circumstances, such as inadvertantly skipped clues and grumpy security guards, worked against you, but you still pulled off a very succesful hunt by any standard. Every team finished, and by the sound of blog chatter at least, had fun. Was the post-hunt event enjoyable?

All participants can look forward to a very different sort of hunt this Tuesday. We're hoping Riddles In The Dark will be fast-paced, exciting, high-energy, and slightly cooler, temperture-wise at least. You'd do well have your wits about you. Perhaps a Bowie knife as well.


There are two pop culture phenomena that were part of my youth that have recently come back to my attention. I want to check and see if anyone else has memories of these wondrous things, so we can get together and talk about the good old days.

1. I've always been a fan of Adult Swim, but I'm crazy about their newest program: Pee-Wee's Playhouse, starring Paul Reubens as Pee-Wee Herman. I spent a good part of my youth watching Pee-Wee, both on his TV show (theme by Todd Rundgren, music by Mark Mothersbau!) and in two marvelous feature films: Pee-Wee's Big Adventure (directed by Tim Burton!) and Pee-Wee's Big Top. Does anyone else have a personal relationship with Pee-Wee Herman?

2. Bernard Kliban's cartoon strip Cats was introduced to me by my cousins through a couple of excellent books. Apparently, it used to be a comic strip, perhaps a semi-feature in the New Yorker. It's marvelously absurd and makes me laugh out loud every 4 strips or so. Maybe it's all "cat humor," but I like to think that Cats is funny enough to overcome petty dog people/cat people boundries. So does anyone besides this guy know about this strip?

Mattson: When are you going to make me that damn shirt already? If you take much longer, I may have to turn to some competing T-shirt service to get my Gondor chest-piece.

Cappelle: I have yet to crack open the Lord of the Rings radio show. The whole 13 hours on 13 CDs thing is a little intimidating. I'm thinking I'll start it up while driving too and from work. I'm considering putting it onto my iPod, just because that would be pretty bad-ass.

15000 Strong Atleast

I finally got it done, and only 3,500 hits past 15,000.

I'm Pope Hilarius II

If you were the next pope, what would your pope name be?
(Must be a successor to one of the previous popes.)

If it weren't already taken, I'd be Innocent X (that's pronounced "Eks," of course).

One Nation Under A Very Specific God

There are a bunch of Mormons staying at Lost Lake Lodge, the resort where I work. They seem to have only one wife per man, but I guess it's possible (likely, really) thateach man just took his favorite wife and left the rest at home. They certainly seem to have brought all the kids, though, as they do have about 15 children for 6 adults.

So, Mormons are crazy and all, but that's not the point of this story. I was seating some other table, and I couldn't help but overhear one of the excessively well-groomed young men in a striped polo shirt say "So God sent Jesus Christ, his only son, down to earth to die for our sins. But it turns out that he only died for a select few people..."

I was a bit confused; was he explaining scripture to a bunch of Mormons? But it all became clear as he continued. "Only 122,000 people were saved and are going to heaven." The table erupted with laughter.

The Mormons were making fun of Jehova's Witnesses for having such a crazy religion. Mormons were doing this.






Mormons.

Good times. Oh, and has anyone else heard that Prince is a Jehova's Witness now? I wasn't sure at first, but now it seems like to sort of thing he would do, just to be different.

The Eyes of the Ranger are Upon You

+ I was gone for the last week so was unable to finish the the 15000 party thing, I had just really gotten going then my great grandma died, so I was in Michigan for the last week. My stay was quite uneventful, so I won't bore you with the details.

+ I'm currently watching Walker, Texas Ranger and it has already featured Chuck Norris wrestling a grizzly bear and fighting a mysterious mountain man who uses only grunts to communicate and has a metal plate over half of his head. Now the grizzly bear just came out of nowhere and killed the mountain man just before Chuck Norris was going to be crushed. Damn that was intense. Walker, Texas Ranger is the manliest show ever

The invading armies planned for everything - except for eight kids called "The Wolverines."

I saw this movie for sale for $10 at Best Buy the other day. I looked at the cover and read a little bit of the back, and I thought to myself "Damn, I'll bet I'd really enjoy this." Patrick Swayze, Charlie Sheen, and PATRICK SWAYZE are mild-mannered young men from the Midwest, but when those damn Russians decide that the time is ripe to launch their invasion on America, Swayze and some other guys spring into action and move to defend their beloved nation from the Ruskies.
All this thinking about Swayze movies reminded me of the all-time classic "Roadhouse" (the box of the DVD has a review describing it as "A violent tough-guy thriller"). More specifically, I thought of the scene where Patrick orders a cup of coffee (black, duh), and the barkeep says "Leaded or unleaded?" and the Swayz answers "Leaded!" with a chuckle. I have a dream that someday I will order coffee, and be asked "Leaded or unleaded?" so I can respond with "Leaded!" and a chuckle.

I should be Dalton (Swayze's character in Roadhouse) for Halloween. I'd just need a tight black t-shirt, jeans, boots, and a stare so icy it could freeze the devil himself dead in his tracks.

Bought a ringtone today: A Tribe Called Quest's "I Left My Wallet In El Segundo." There was no Talking Heads and the Prince collection was pitiful, so I went with my favorite rap chorus.

I forgot a couple of LOTR lines for everyday use.

10,000 strong at least.--Aragorn
Use it: Whenever asked how much of something there are. (thanks erik)

Your staff is broken.--Gandalf
Use it: Whenever someone gets owned.

My New Poster

Is better than your new poster.



11'4" by 7'4". 128 sheets of paper.
Now the hard part - putting it on the wall.

he's almost like michael jordan

tonight at work we were doing surveys for people in minnesota. (for once, something LOCAL)

a bunch of names kept popping up...and then...before i knew it...

kubas: "hi, is tim lange* available?"

he wasn't home. what a job.

*It probably wasn't THE tim lange

Here At The End Of All Things

I just finished watching the Lord of the Rings trilogy all the way through, and I'm just about ready to watch it again.

They've just got so much going for them. The Battle of Helm's Deep is my favorite movie action sequence, that scene where Sam picks up Frodo is the most heartbreaking/homosexual thing you'll ever see, and Christopher Lee could act his way into any terrorist organization if he chose to do so.

But my favorite thing about the Lord of the Rings is not the action, nor the effects, nor the 124 detailed characters (4 of them women). No, it is the dialouge that cemented my love for these movies. It's rich, it's dark, it's literary, and it's perfect for adding a touch of class to everyday situations. Here are a few of my favorite quotes and the situations to use them in.

A red sun rises. Blood has been spilled this night. --Legolas
Use it: Every time you see a sunrise.

My business is with Isengaard tonight. --Treebeard
Use it: Just before embarking on a nocturnal adventure.

That sword was broken! --Ghost of the Dwimmoberg
It has been remade! --Arrogorn
Use it: Whenever someone comments on something that they thought was still destroyed, but has been rebuilt.
Example: Rube:"Hey, look at Iven's On The Bay. I thought that place burned down." You:"It has been remade!"

Orcs don't use it...orcs don't know it. They go round, for miles! --Golem
Use it: When traversing or describing a secret path.

Riders of Rohan, oaths you have taken, now fulfill them all! --Eomer
Use it: When rallying troops before battle...metaphorically speaking.

They shall break on this fortress as water on rock. --Theodan
Use it: When reassuring comrades of the strength of your defenses.

Legolas, what do your elf eyes see? --Arrogorn
Use it: When someone goes ahead to scope out a situation.

What new devilry is this? --Borameer
Use it: When an already sticky situation looks to get even worse.

The dead do not suffer the living to pass! --Ghost of the Dwimmoberg
You will suffer me! --Arrogorn
Use it: When threatened by ghosts. Or if someone talks about how they don't "suffer fools ligthly."

Just start dropping these lines in everyday situations. You'll be more popular than, than...okay, I could drop some LOTR reference here, but I think I've done enough damage already.

Now here, by the shores of the sea, comes the ending of this post. Good luck, my friends.

oh. man.

cub foods. buy (3) 2-liter pepsi products, get (2) 2-liter "diet pepsi jazz" bottles free. i highly recommend trying out this new...flavor. i couldn't find any pictures, so i figured i'd provide you with all of the health/ingredient information. you should be able to gather a well rounded mental picture from that website.

after my tastebuds danced with glory...i kind of realized that the manly mustaches don't have an official team drink. keeping that in mind, i now nominate "diet pepsi jazz" as the official team beverage. having just said that, i understand no one would vote for it.

reason for this post: what, if anything, should be the official drink of the manly mustaches? perhaps i will make a poll regarding this CRUCIAL question.

We'll Lead As Two Kings

Postulate: If Wanninger and Hewitt had been outspoken conservitives, Taylor Stevenson would be a Republican right now. Discuss.

At work today I was singing two songs: "Moonshadow" and "The History of Tencious D." So when I climbed in my car, I had to make a choice: Cat Stevens or Tenacious D? I told myself "I'll just listen to one D song, then switch to Cat Stevens." End result? I sang along to The D the whole way home at maximum volume.

So I got to thinkin: remember my plan for the lip synch, with Vanessa Carleton's White Houses and all that? I think Tenacious D would work even better, because A: I actually know every word and inflection and timing for most D songs, unlike White Houses, and B: I would really just need two guys on guitars to back me up, one of whom would be Kyle. Would people recognize it? Would they have to?

Proposed song list:
First part of "Fuck Her Gently" (before, you know, the profanity and all)
Wonderboy
Explosivo?
Tribute

Feedback is appreciated.

P.S.: After promoting "Hooked On A Feeling" with such certainty and determination, I'm losing confidence. Should we go with The Winner? It's a pretty hilarious song, plus it's Coolio. Everybody listen to it. Oh, sam, can you do one of those YSI things for it? That said, what's so great about "Tonight, Tonight"? And where is it written that each classes' grad song must be greater than that which came before it? Final Countdown was good, but we can still try to get something funny for our grad song. Ooh, and who could perform The Winner?

P.P.S.: The book I'm reading now is entitled "Goedel, Escher, Bach: An Eternal Golden Braid--A Metaphorical Fugue On Minds And Machines In The Spirit Of Lewis Carroll." It's my second book in a row that discusses non-Euclidian geometry (the first one was "Flatterland," if you must know).

Anchors Away, my boys, Anchors Aweigh. Farewell to foreign shores, We sail at break of day-ay-ay-ay...

9 years ago, a young boy who went by the name "Andy Kubas" (prounounced koo-BISS) made a promise to his grandmother:

"Grandma, when I'm 18 I'm going to take you out to the casino."

If you will, fast forward nine years, a few deaths, and an awful battle with cancer. Somehow, we've managed to both live these last 9 years...and thus I had to live up to my half of the deal.

So yesterday my Grandmother was "showing me the ropes" of the casino. I reached into my pocket...pulled out one George Washington (in bill form) and bet away. What happened next was similar to this blog. The $1 suddenly turned into $6...and then the $6 went to $14...$14 to $40...$40 to $56...and before I knew it the $56 turned into $70! (I don't know how that correlates with the blog) I had to brag about that. What's even more impressive yet...all that dinero came from the slots. (If Brian Agre reads this...you'll never guess who was playing blackjack: LEE ALTO. I called it!!!!!!!)

In other news:

I'm now officially registered for the draft.

So this is the number I'll be looking for in the event a draft is needed. At least, I THINK this is the number--it might be my Social Security number...they were a little unclear about that. Don't you feel so safe knowing the potential future of your country may be in my hands?

Tariq Abdul-Wahad

He's Real.

You Will Suffer Me

I think the time has come to begin the campaign in earnest.

ATTENTION CLASS OF 2007: Your treasured memories are in danger. Forces seemingly beyond your control are conspiring to give you a class song just as lame as your class t-shirt. You can change your destiny, but only if you join me in my crusade for the greatest class song of all time. Yes, I'm referring to David Hasslehoff's unforgettable rendition of Hooked On A Feeling.

I know what you're saying. "But I don't want to have my class song be a joke. I like lots of music. Surely there must be a more serious song that lots of people would embrace!" You are wrong. There is no way we can get more than a handful of people who will support a serious choice. Our musical tastes are just too varied. You could risk it, get a few friends together and hope your 15 votes are enough to get your favorite song in. But with that plan, you risk another, slightly larger group doing the same thing. Then what do you have? Toby Keith? Fallout Boy? Gwen Stefani? The results could be too horrible to contemplate.

Believe me, I'd rather have some music I honestly enjoy as our class song. But I'm realistic enough to realize that there's no way I could get a plurality to endorse Coolio's "The Winner" as our class song. That is why a thouroughly ironic choice is our only hope.

Go forth and watch this video. You will have to agree that a performance based upon it would be the highlight of any graduation ceremony. The entire choir can be back up with the "Ooga-Chaka"s, and whoever is the main performer can switch costumes a few times (Heavy fur parka-->trenchcoat and turtleneck-->tuxedo with bowtie undone). I will do it if need be, but I think we could find a slightly more musically talented (but still acceptable) person. I don't know if Joey T has the stage presence needed.Maybe Josh Ellens? He's got the pipes for it. Here's hoping he has the....chutzpah.

P.S.: Sam+josh, how about making a better design for our class shirt? And I'm thinking I might use a Lord Of The Rings line for my senior quote.

"My business is with Isengaard tonight."--Treebeard

"Make a wish and just blow it all away..." ("C'mon" by Guster)

Thank The Lord For The Nighttime

My recent semi-ironic Neil Diamond kick has yielded up yet another possible sub-title for the night-hunt: this post's title. However, I think Riddles In The Dark is much creepier, and thus better for our assasain themed-teams. Don't worry, there will be plenty of chances for a Neil Diamond themed hunt in the future. Who's feeling a winter hunt over Christmas break, by the way?

Because summer is slightly more than 1/2 way done, now is the perfect time for my pre-school anxiety to begin. I know, I know, I'll probably do just fine. But I think one of the keys to my academic success thus far has been my irrational fear that I'll fuck up at some point. Really keeps me motivated. So...anybody reccomend any physics texts I should look into?

A Google search for "Max Kuehn" revealed this charming young actor of the same name.

How am I supposed to compete with this? I guess he is a ginger, and therefore soulless, so I've got that going for me, which is nice.

"If you take out the killings, Washington actually has a very low crime rate." -Marion Barry, Mayor of Washington, D.C.

This morning (well..it's morning for ME...afternoon for most "normal" individuals) I woke up feeling sicker than Bill Murray in Osmosis Jones. (Thank you, Mrs. Harmer)

I've decided to create another mustache questionnaire. This poll is simply entitled, "Which Manly Mustache are YOU?"

The first section of this “exam” provides you with a correlation between religion and the Manly Mustache that you most represent.

Question 1.
When you participate in religious activities, you:
A.) Are familiar with the Rosary.
B.) Are Lutheran.
C.) Sleep in late, “Worship” the Vikings, and “Pray” for a win. (Get it??)
D.) Face East and repeatedly bow.

The next section of this test will determine, in terms of personality, which mustache you most resemble.

Question 2.
Your very first words were:
A.) “MA-MA”
B.) “I hate you.”
C.) “Dirka Dirka”
D.) “Peter North!”

The next portion of questioning will determine who you will most resemble in roughly 10 years.

Question 3.
In the future, you would like to:
A.) Be happy and make a living.
B.) Own 7 slaves.
C.) Change the first name on your birth certificate to “Lucifer.”
D.) Transform into the Antichrist.

The following portion of the test measures how you match up to our “Manly Men” in terms of your quick-witted mental thinking.

Question 4.

When you get into verbal arguments, you respond by saying,
A.) “How about I say potato…and YOU say nothing at all.”
B.) “You better stop talking or I’ll fly a plane into your house.”
C.) “Hey girly man, that water is wet!”
D.) “Yeah. Do you wanna touch my muscles?”

The final part of our questioning examines your sense of style on the road. You’d be surprised, but the type of car you like tells a lot about you.

Question 5.
Of the following Hot Wheels cars, which intrigues you the most?

A.)














B.)











C.)














D.)










And now, your answers.

Question one:

(A.) If you chose A, you are more than likely Catholic. You enjoy a good ol’ mass and are a strong religious Mustache. In terms of religion, you could be classified as a “Josh Bundy.”

(B.) Hey! Look at you! The odds are your entire congregation is white, Scandinavian, and has tried lutefisk at least once in their lives. Keep it up, and try looking for Max. At least I think he’s Lutheran. If not, then you’re a trend-setting Mustache. But, for the time being, in terms of religion, you could be classified as a “Max.”

(C.) Well, Mr./Ms. “Letter C,” it looks like you aren’t too into the spiritual world, but we’ll forgive you. Your passion for sports…and making sleeping a sport…is one of the principle characteristics of your life. If you were a specific Mustache, you would most certainly be Tom Day.

(D.) You may not actually be Islamic, but you certainly look the part. Your characteristics include: being darker in the winter than anyone in the summer, being able to speak “Dirka Dirka” and having a Tariq Abdul-Wahad basketball card collection. For religious purposes, you are Andrew Kubas.

Question two:

(A.) So you chose letter A. We can’t officially verify that any of the Mustaches ACTUALLY said “MA-MA” as their first words, but hey, we’re measuring personality here. You were raised in a gentle, mustache-friendly environment. You are the kind, friendly mustache who has a personality similar to that of Max, Kurt, or Tom. You should try talking with them some time!

(B.) You aren’t exactly the nicest of mustaches. You tend to have a bitter, suicidal view towards the world. You likely live that “excuse-me-while-I-flip-off-the-rest-of-the-world” type of lifestyle. Don’t worry, personality isn’t EVERYTHING. But, in terms of personality, you’re a “Sam Walker.”

(C.) Your first words were “Dirka Dirka,” too? Well, the odds are simple: Either you’re viewing this website from the Middle East, or your name is Andrew Kubas. What’s that? Your last name is Derby? Nope, you didn’t say it right. Personality: Kubas.

(D.) Your personality can be summed up in one word: perverse. You more than likely have a mustache…but it is one found only in the “back section” of the movie store. The average American is afraid to shake your hand on account of…we don’t know where it has been. Please wash it with Warm Water+Soap+At least 30 seconds=Personality of Josh Johnson.

Question three:

(A.) Ahh! You chose letter A! Thank you, friendly mustache. You are what we describe as in a state of mental bliss—you know what you want and how to get it—and don’t worry, it will soon be yours! You are a hard working Mustache and we thank you for that. In a few years you may pass your “barhandle” exam. If law isn’t the career you’re leaning towards, no worries, you’ll be a success at whatever you do! In 10 years you will be living at the same pace as Tom, Kurt, Max, and Bundy. Good job!

(B.) So you chose letter B? Well, you are a Mustache who enjoys a bit of power and authority. The odds are you may drive a truck which is proudly bearing the confederate flag. Newsflash: The South didn’t win. Quick: are you sucking on a piece of straw? If the answer is yes, in 10 years you’ll be right alongside Sam Walker.

(C.) Ok…so you desire to have the name Lucifer. First and foremost: Have you ever seen a picture of the devil with a mustache? Next question: Have you ever realized how SWEET Jesus looks in a mustache? Heck, he’s sporting a FULL BEARD. Beard rearranged=bread which means Jesus belongs to our Party. So, basically, if you want to be named “Lucifer” talk to Sam Walker, because this is the path he’ll be taking in a few years.

(D.) If you thought choices B and C were pretty bad, well D is easily the clincher. A Manly Mustache is typically thought of as someone who brings benefits to humanity. The Antichrist isn’t exactly a GOOD thing. You’re probably wondering, “Who’s going to become the Antichrist in 10 years??” The answer: Sam Walker. That’s right, for those of you keeping track of the score at home, in 10 years Sam will be a 7-person-slave-owning-Antichrist named Lucifer.

Question four:

(A.) If you chose letter A: You are the funniest guy alive. Well, actually you’re not, but you have the wit of the funniest guy alive. You can click here to learn more about the full story. Simply put, you have the clever wit of Maxwell.

(B.) Looks like you have chosen letter B. You aren’t exactly the best arguer in the world. Instead of having your own immediate/clever comebacks, you just instantly resort to using the threat of violence. Not only do you cut to the chase, but better yet you are able to throw in your own religion-bashing statement. You’re a Manly Mustache who responds similar to the way an Andrew Kubas would.

(C.) If you chose letter C, you aren’t the most eloquent of Mustaches. However, you don’t care. When frustrated at another individual, you just throw in random bits and pieces of your life. Your frustration doesn’t get you far, but it sure provides entertainment for anyone who is watching. You are most like Bundy.

(D.) At long last, letter D. You, my friend, just resort to using your muscles. I’ll bet that in your spare time you rub yourself down with oil, wear nothing but a Herculean-like shirt and flex in the mirror. Side effects include: Squatting 305, becoming a 3rd degree black belt, and living without a colon. OK, OK, sure, he’s not TECHNICALLY a Mustache, but I had to throw him in the loop. You most resemble the clever wit of Adam Pelkey.

Question five:

(A.) Our first selection is just plain classy. You drive a car older than any of our readers. As long as you don’t mind the occasional engine failure, it’s a pretty reliable car. It takes you 6 hours of work each day just to pay the cost of gas—but who cares? You get to cruise around in a car playing funky-fresh music and make any male over the age of 45 jealous. You are a Max…or a Lincoln Towncar.

(B.) If you chose letter B, you enjoy living a fast paced life. You paid more for your car than your 73 friends combined, and boy do you hear about it. Little do they know, it’s the car you’ll be stuck with for the next 16 years. Let’s hope it lasts! For the time being, you’re the envy of the block (or entire school) and can pick up chicks left and right. You, my friend, when it comes to your style are most like Josh Bundy…or a Mercury Montego.

(C.) Letter C proves that you are the wisest Mustache. You have picked an affordable car…you are definitely preparing for the future. You made a wise investment—you get a bit more than 20 miles to the gallon, rarely have any problems, and you give many Mustaches rides across the Mustache Nation. You may click with Tom Day, Kurt, or even Sam Walker.

(D.) You are the most economical of Mustaches. Your car may be a bit rugged, and perhaps even unorthodox, but look at the top of this webpage. (You know, the part right underneath the really big “Manly Mustaches” white lettering.) Yes, your car may be pink, and yes, it may be scratched up, but you make up for it by purchasing a frickin’ sweet hula girl and a stinky air freshener. Did we even mention 41 MPG’s? YOU, dear Mustache brother (or sister) have the sleek-and-sexy style of Kubas. Can you tell he just wrote that?

Perhaps you’ve had the personality of just one mustache during this entire poll. Good for you! Maybe you’re a combination of a number of Mustaches. <--Even Better! The Mustaches are taking over the entire world, so you might as well become familiar with them now. Welcome to the Mustache Nation!

If You Could Just Go Half Coke, Half Diet Coke

Remember in those old Loony Toons cartoons when a coyote or hunter would be outwitted by an clever desert bird or a long-legged rabbit, and in the 3 seconds before the boulder falls, or the bomb blows, or the air gives out beneath the foolish predator's feet, he would be metaphorically transformed into a donkey, often with the word "JACKASS" helpfully branded on his ample haunch? I had a moment like that today at work. Except there was no unaccounably wiley small game to blame it on. It was all me, baby.

A group of 11 people came in for dinner, and I checked my chart to make sure I knew where they were going. They were staying at the resort, so they were "cabin guests" and their table was noted with a cabin number. I noticed that there was a word written on the table too, so I assumed it was their name.
"Celiac, party of 11?" I asked.
"Um, well, that's our disease, so yeah..." replied one of the women.

I looked at my chart again and realized that "Celiac" was not their name, but rather the name of a genetic disease one of their party had.

Jesus Christ, what a smooth fucking move.
"Oh, Celiac, party of 11? Whoops, I'm sorry! That's not your name! It's a disease you have! You're welcome for the reminder, I'm sure you needed it! Oh, and you're also welcome for the new knowledge that yes, we do think of you in terms of your disorder! Have a great meal!"

I later found out that Celiac Disease is mostly a matter of gluten intolerance, which is a restaurant issue, so it's not so bad. But still: ouch.

P.S.: Looking through my parents' big CD shelf (where I once located an unopened copy of Credence Clearwater Revivals' greatest hits), I came across a massive two-disc set of The Essential Neil Diamond. I know what you're thinking; how could one possibly fit all of the Neil Diamond one needed onto a paltry two discs. Well, the creators did an excellent job in narrowing it down to a fit and trim 38 tracks. But seriously folks, it's nice to have Girl, You'll Be A Woman Soon. And I can make way more Saving Silverman musical references now.

Kubas, do you listen to Neil Diamond. No offense, but you strike me as the kind of guy who might.

highlight of my night

tonight (at work) we were fundraising in michigan. i called a man named michael jordan.

he was black.

THE JUGGERNAUT

I don't know if any of you have seen this, but sit back for about ten minutes with a bag of popcorn and enjoy the insanity

Important!!

Okay, no gay pictures here, it's time to get serious. We need to answer serious questions about the upcoming team for intramural. I refuse to join johnson's team, and i will personally cut out anyone's eyes who wishes to join johnson's team. we need a minimum of, i'd say....eight players? Kubas, Kurt, Max, Bundy......four more. my plan is - let's each four of us work on getting another person on the team. Everyone pick one person whom they will solicitate and subdue. I will pick when everyone else picks because i have no idea what the hell is going on. Let this be the post where we get preliminary things figured out, including hashing out some ideas for the shirts, voting for them, blah blah whatever you guys want to do. By the way, i also would not mind chipping in a few extra bucks for an awesome new shirt design.

Rocket Sauce

Good:
-Turns out my mom's best friend's aunt's husband works at Princeton, so my mom and I are going to go out to Jersey over MEA to visit them and check out the campus.

-My marvelous mother just bought me a cell phone. My crippling internet paranoia won't allow me to post the number here, but feel free to ask me in person. Oh, I also need the phone number of every person I've ever known, apparently.

Bad:
-I had to go to Wal-Fart today to price out some treasure hunt items.

Good within the Bad:
-I managed to be really pissed at Wal-Mart the entire time I was shopping.
-I only spent $2.67.
-I found a marvelous little device in the camping equipment consisting of a fork with a Swiss Army knife in the handle and a combined knife/spoon. It had an excellent name, which I'm considering using as my phone's name: Hobo Tool.

Love Will Tear Us Apart

Greatest song ever? I say yes.

Endless Summer

I've been experiencing a lull in dynamite blog material later (and let me tell you, we accept nothing less than premium grade TNT on this particular web-log), so I decided to dip into the vaults of solid gold material I have laying around. Because everyone knows the sign of a thriving artist is the rehashing and reuse of old ideas.

So here's the story: I got a dumb chain email from somebody (the first block of text below), and it was so dumb that I, being an unbearable smartass, had to write a reply even though no one would ever see it. But then there were blogs! So now, I release to you the original message and the constant_k response, available for the first time to the general public.


Love is a slow kiss goodnight.
It is anticipation.
Love is an imperfection in yourself not bothering you.
It is acceptance.
Love is passing up an opportunity because the time isn’t right yet.
It is patience.
Love is a back massage that starts above the hairline and ends around the innersoles.
It is exploration.
Love is not having to say, "Let’s make love", because you know what the other person wants.
It is understanding.
It is consideration.
Love is both of you remembering protection.
It is responsibility.
Love is saying the perfect phrase to make a solemn embrace dissolve into giggles.
It is humor.
Love is reviewing the damage to your living room and realizing personal effects are strewn in a clockwise pattern from the front door to the bedroom.
It is desire.
Love is seeing what your lover really looks like for the first time.
It is truth.
Love is knowing what time it is and not caring.
It is joy.
Love is the arms around you tightening their embrace.
It is ecstasy.
Love is seeing a new side of a person you thought you knew.
It is renewal.
Love is telling a person if you have to leave, you will let them sleep, and being told they would rather be awakened.
It is tenderness.
Love is waking up to find the subject of the dream you were having asleep on your shoulder.
It is where fantasy meets reality.
Love is being there to wake your lover. Slowly.
It is sensuousness.
Love is belatedly knowing why you bothered to buy a queen size bed three years ago.
It is practicality.
Love is two people only taking up a third of a queen size bed.
It is closeness.
Love is knowing you gave the extra set of keys to the right person.
It is trust.
Love is saying goodbye and knowing you will be back by mutual consent.
It is faith.
Love is stretching your arms and discovering the real meaning of the word "sore".
It is a lesson in human frailty.
Love is opening your medicine cabinet and finding your toothpaste turned into a pretzel.
It is adaptation.
Love is sitting at the window, looking out and remembering who you were the night before.
It is reflection.
Love is hearing the weather forecast for a winter storm and wishing you could spend it in bed with your lover.
It is loneliness.
Love is stories that will never be told.
It is personal.

Love is a slow kiss goodnight.

Love is a long, sappy, impersonal chain email.
It is annoying.
Love is flossing until your gums bleed.
It is gross.
Love is another saturday night with your parents.
It is pathetic. Love is a misguided mixtape.
It is rejection.
Love is a web of desperate lies.
It is deception.
Love is heavy breathing over the phone.
It is creepy.
Love is losing old friends.
It is sad.

Love is a long, sappy, impersonal chain email.

Mustache 2007?

In my last post I suggested that we stay as the Manly Mustaches again for intramural, and I didn't really get any feedback. I think we should especially now that we know Johnson won't bring back the Mustaches. I know the Monstars shirts were pretty amazing but they also would be very expensive with 5 or 6 colors on them. I found a new possible logo, tell me what you think.

Jerry Bruckheimer, Eat Your Cold Black Heart Out.

Went to Pirates Of The Caribbean 2: Dead Man' Chest mit meinem Vater today. It was okay; not nearly as much fun as the first one. It felt a little too quest driven, with all the action based around "I need this or that magical object so I can give it so so-and-so and get something else I need blah blah blah."

I was distracted from the action because I kept thinking about another, very similar movie: Pride and Prejudice. Not only was Kiera "Skeletal Hottie" Knightley in both films (she looks better in boy's clothes; I think they hide the clavicals a little better), the guy who did such a good job as the creepy, sniveling Mr. Collins is in "Pirates" as a cold-blooded, power-hungry East India Company rep. He's not as good this time around, but he's still short and angry, so that's funny.

I got to thinking about how much better both these films could be if only someone had the vision to put them together. If one were to combine P+P's unerring wit and strong characters with CoP2:DMC's giant squid graphics, one would create Pride of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Prejudice. Elizabeth Bennet and Jack Sparrow fight a class-obsessed society and cursed pirates in pursuit of true love and gold dubloons.

P.S.: Live Tenatious D is pretty awesome. Thanks Mattson!

bye bye, lebanon.

i bought a freakin' amazing mustache shirt. it glows in the dark. like 5 different mustaches looking right back at you. it's quality.

bundy and i were playing tennis tonight. basically...out of nowhere a man walked up to us. he had that infamous "molester mustache" and began talking. i was frightened. he was your stereotypical "let-me-show-you-my-beer-belly-while-i-smoke-a-cigarette-and-blow-it-in-your-face" type of molester. nice guy.

after that man left, a younger molester approached us. he came carrying a tennis racquet...but appeared to have no desire to play tennis. at first, he walked towards us to look at the tennis ball machine and watch us play. he didn't talk to us...he just stared. after a few minutes, he headed out of the tennis courts and began approaching bundy's pimped out mercury. we decided to high tail it out of there...and he gave me the "let's-lock-eyes-while-you-drive-away-and-i'll-wink-at-you" gaze. pew.

if you have a chance, listen to "distant lover" by marvin gaye. (the live version) the screaming/yelling is grand.

at long last, i was able to find the "mustache tweak of the week," although he doesn't really have a mustache.



Zidane Is Being Stupid On His Last Game - video powered by Metacafe

I'm Pretty Sure I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings

So I just finished On The Road, and my inevitable Dean Moriarty/Josh Mattson comparison felt strongest in this one line:

"One morning he stood naked, looking at all San Francisco out the window as the sun came up. He looked like someday he'd be the pagan mayor of San Francisco."

This could be a perfect fit.

(note:I found this item using Google Book Search, a tool that up until now I did not know existed, but that apparently contains a whole bunch of books, scanned in page by page? Sam Walker, you should know about this. Enlighten me.)

P.S.: Today's featured article on Wikipedia was on Velociraptors. Good times.

P.P.S.: Kubas, please explain further about the food booth at the fair, I think I lost your email.

P.P.P.S.:Um, is there basketball at the Y this Saturday? When? I'm not real clear on that.

The Mark Has Been Made

Although I have very loose ties to this fine organization, I have decided to leave.

So it goes,
All Day
and yes I will be there Saturday.

are YOU the next american mustache?

for the millions of americans (and mustache readers) who are avid fans of reality TV shows, i thought to myself, "Why not have a reality BLOG show?"

it's up to YOU to become the next "american mustache". Although, you don't REALLY have to be american. let's say...you're...oh i don't know, ITALIAN...you can audition!

send us your mustache pictures. whether you're "a man, woman, girl or guy" (name that quote for +25 bonus mustache points) it doesn't matter. if you have spent months growing a mustache, or purchased a fake one at the dollar store, it's all good. pretty much any mustache is game.

then...it will be up to the AMERICAN audience (also known as our blog readers) to vote for...THE...AMERICAN...MUSTACHE!

you can e-mail pictures to myself, or, if you prefer, any other mustache member. let the games begin!

Anonymous Comments are Off

That is all.

I Was Stabbed By Satan

Hot damn, was I ever wrong. This blog is as jumping as ever!

So, Canada: I had a great time at the Winnipeg Folk Fest. Spent some quality time with the cousins and saw some great bands. My favorites:

Hawksley Workman: Not only is his name "Hawksley Workman," he's also quite entertaining. His description in the ridiculously complimentary but nonetheless charming guide to festival performers (Everyone over 40 is a living legend, under 40 is the next big thing. Every performer's musical style is a something-infused blend of something and something else.) says far more about him than I ever could:
"His songs are sensual studies in lyrical decadence and melodic grace, delivered by a voice so vast that it can alternately rattle the sky or whisper to the wind."
Couldn't have said it better myself.

Tons Of Fun University (T.O.F.U.): This one was special. Two big fat guys, both former National Poetry Jam champions, perform funny, often heartwarming poems over beats provided by a badass beatboxer. Better than it sounds, trust me...

K'naan: A Somoli-born rapper, I was unsure what to think about him at first. He is described as "one of Canadian hip-hop's most profound and thoughtful voices," which made me worry that he would just be a whiny peacenik. I made plans to see all his performances and caught exactly none of them, but I decided to take a chance and bought his album. And woulnd't you know it, he kicks ass. He's got such a smooth flow and kickin' beats he can make warlords and water shortages danceable.

Overall, there was some great music and some not so great music (think "Return of the Estro-jam" and "One Fiddle To Rule Them All"), but mostly just a splendid time for all.

Oh, and there were two acts that made me think of Sam Walker: Tagaq, a crazy throat singer from Nunavut who has (drumroll please)..."collaborated with experimental diva Bjork"! Plus, she performed with a guy on a powermac who swayed back and forth as he mixed the song together on the fly. I think we've found the career for Sam. Also very walkeresqe was That 1 Guy, who more than made up for his dumb name with his uniqely troffler-friendly performances. He performed solo with his homemade, 7-foot-high, two-stringed instrument. It's covered in buttons and strings and microphones, allowing him to sort of create techno-songs on the fly. And let me tell you, he was all over that thang. I have a feeling Sam would have troffled all over the place if he'd been there to see it.

P.S.: AP scores are in. Chem 5 Art 5 Lit 4. Very happy, satisfied, disappointed, respectively.

I Was Born Looking Guilty

I know everyone is awaiting the newest Manly Mustache video, and I know that I should've had it done a week ago, but unfortunately I don't. I've been far too busy working on my basketball skills at the YMCA and I can't get any good music because all my songs are on my other computer on which the CD drive stopped working. I'll try to get it done soon.

While at the YMCA a couple of days ago I ran into Tom Hennen, I beat him in a game of 21 and hopefully impressed him enough to sway him towards our team next year. Also while there he proposed that we get some people together for a game sometime, which sounded like a good idea to me since I'm guessing some Mustaches have been slacking off and haven't touched a basketball so far this summer. Anyone interested?

I'm having second thoughts about changing the name of our team next year. The Manly Mustaches have built a legacy and an international fan base, I suggest new shirts, but retain the Mustache name.

5 points for naming the movie and actor my title quotes

Mustache Related News

Mustaches: The Early Years

check out this video i found of the manly mustaches...pre mustaches.

have no fear...your coke is here!

World Cup. Italy.

Man, that's crazy. I'm guessing the sounds from the Fayna household were as follows:

"Ahhhhh! OOOhhhh!!!!" followed by a lot of Italian.

Tip of the Hat to the Scratched up Lenny. 480 miles on 12.6 gallons of gas.

Wag of the Finger to Zinedine Zidane. That was inappropriate. (but pretty cool)

So, for those who are "unaware," we will be starting some random mustache challenges. You could win the greatest mustache of them all--an Abraham Lincoln--just by earning the most mustache points. It's a monthly giveaway! We're so dang humanitarian! (Check out the July standings on the sidebar...)

6-2=4. 2/6=33%

66% of our mustache contributor crew stayed in town the last few days--and what did we get?--a solid effort from Bundy. Thanks, man. At least the Chef is still cookin'.

For 20 mustache bonus points: I just downloaded a crackwhore Imperials song. Guess the song...get the points! (one guess per comment...unlimited comments) God I'm a douche.

With so much talk of "the blog going to hell" because of the absence of max and kubas, i wondered to myself, not very seriously, "has everyone forgotten about bundy?" so, since everyone loves my gay posts, i figured it would be even more special to post two un-gay people doing something gay! Enjoy! by the way, if you can guess how MANY gay men i will have in my next picture, i will raise kubas' 10-point deal and give you all 20 points. 20 points for what? who the hell knows!

Nobody Puts Baby In The Corner

I realize this is my fourth post in three days, but I will be in a mysterious place without Internet (it's known as "Canada") until monday or tuesday, so I figured I'd give ya'll a supply of quality mustache posts for when I'm gone. As the fat in a camel's hump allows him (or her) to go for days with very little food or water on long desert treks, this small backlog of posts shall sustain thee until my return.

Memory flash while walking through Gregory Park today: My birthday party last April (it was a little delayed), playing junta darts at dusk by the stone arch. Junta darts, by the way, are small cones of paper fired out of PVC tubes; really, they're just a different method of "tagging" someone. On this particular day, we were playing two-hits-and-you're-out single-flag capture the flag. I don't recall the precise teams, but our own Janitor was making a run across an ice patch when Josh Ellens loaded up a dart and opened fire. Kurt moved to dodge, but he slipped on the ice and was hit as he fell to his back. Ellens rushed up while loading another dart, stopped just above the Janitor, growled "See you in Hell" in his best Solid Snake voice, and finished him off with a point blank shot. Damn.

For some reason when I think of this moment, I subconciously replace Kurt with Sam Walker. Maybe because Ellens basically did this to Sam every day in Art History.

GBTH III: Riddles In The Dark

In the spirit of the 4th of July and all those guys that did all that great stuff all that time ago, I spent the past couple of days making a flag pole. I know, after all, that all those fellas really cared about the flag. Old Glory, Old Ironsides, The Star Spangled heart of our great nation!

However, in a delightfully subversive touch, I'm not going to use this flag pole to fly the Stars and Stripes. Rather, it will be the perfect venue to display my full-size Jolly Roger (a Christmas gift from my cousins, purchased in Seattle). Hey, at least it's not a Confederate flag. I'll never understand why people own those, but I'm doubly perplexed as to why they would fly them on the 4th of July. Um, go slavery?

Anyways, I made this sweet flag pole out of PVC pipe, two nuts and two bolts, and some flag clips, all available at your friendly neighborhood Fleet Farm. The 8 foot length is pretty optimal for its use as a standard when leading troops into battle, and it's a convienient length for majestic waving, but mostly it's the longest the pole could be and still fit in my van for the trip to Canada. See, this beast is going to be planted at our campsite at the Winnipeg Folk Festival.

My personal touch was the capital (is that what you call the thing atop the pole?). I searched my room for something appropriately cool and pirate-themed, and came across a decapitated bust of Wagner and a perfectly-proportioned glow-in-the-dark skull: it was totally a sign so I heeded it. Half a hot glue stick later, I was in business.

Treasure Hunt: I think Riddles In The Dark would be a good subtitle for this one. How about a 10 pm start time, and the clues' time limits would total to less that three hours so we'd be all done by 1 pm and avoid the drunks? I think it would be kind of cool to start at dusk and be hurrying before all the light fades...

Das Capital

heh heh FIRST MUSTACHE CHALLENGE (worth 10 points!)

Guess who came to my house today.

Clue: It's a person.

Winner receives +10 bonus points. Only one guess per comment. You get unlimited comments.

I am now leaving on vacation. So I might not award these points for a while.

"Mustache OUT!!"

GBTH III: Mitternacht

Today I came up with a great new name for my cane. It was once Roger McCaney (after my Lowell School pricipal (remember, kids, the school "pricipal" ends in "pal," because he's your pal!)), but a chance intersection in my pictures folder of an image of the cane and an image of a certain Miami-based lion of justice has given birth to the cane's new title: Horatio Cane.

I will now be 8X more badass when using my cane.

Treasure hunt thoughts (my brain seethes with them!): I saw some of the reality show "Treasure Hunt" today, and it was okay. The parts where they actually located and figured out clues was cool, but the show focused more on all the petty drama and alliances and deception and that sucked. My point: treasure hunts should be about the clues, not the people. Also, black light clues look awesome.

And a sneak preview at The Third Great Brainerd Treasure Hunt: Who's up for a midnight start time? Get your glowsticks and maglites ready!

Here's a fun find: http://www.mathleague.com/reports/2001_02/grade678/MN_7.HTM

Try this one too. http://www.mathleague.com/reports/2000_01/grade678/MN_7.HTM

Kiera Knightley-Because Protruding Clavicals Are Dead Sexy

Good moment yesterday: While vainly feeling up the mannequins in Brekkens for 20 minutes (it's a rather long story), a woman passing in the mall said "you've got the wrong word on the back of your shirt there." I was wearing my Ravenclaw-blue "Live Better, Vote Democrat" shirt, so I could only assume that she meant the word "Democrat," and that she would have had it say Republican.

Now, here's the fun part: I had only a half second to respond before this woman passed out of my life forever. My response was not the retrospectively better "Fuck You," nor was it "Fuck You!!," nor "Fuck You, Bitch!!!!!" No, I mumbled "Yeah, well, that's just, like, your opinion, man." I seriously quoted the Dude (from "The Big Lebowski" for all the unwashed out there) without even trying. What a great moment in my life...

I figure next time some violent criminals break into my house, I'll greet them with a hearty "Hey, this is, like, a private residence, man..."

Treasure Hunt

(This is mostly a response to Max's post, but itgot long enough that I decided to make it a full post instead of a comment.)

1. This hunt was intentionally structured linearly. ALL the clues were in the same sequence for everyone, with the exception of four which we thought would not work out with more than one group at a time (Hewitt, Brekkens, the one in the downspout by kixters, and the Water Treatment Center). We wanted the close contact with other teams as an added obstacle (requiring stealth) and as a source of motivation, because you can see how close the other teams are. We weren't sure whether this would be better or worse than having different orders for everyone, but we wanted to try it. In retrospect, I think the linearity is good, but perhaps in smaller doses (maybe a 50/50 split). Also, very few of the clues were intended to lead to twenty-thirty minutes of searching (with the exception of the four aformentioned divergent clues, which we did that way for exactly that reason). It is only due to unforseen cicumstances (the two Bus 110s and, um, whatever happened at First Lutheran) that any required that much time at the location.

2. Speaking of Brekkens: the clue was originally intended to be located under a Mannequins clothing. However, dispite evidence we had to the contrary, Brekkens seemed to be closed that morning when we went to plant it, and we (incorrectly) assumed that, as it wasn't open at 10:30, it wouldn't be opening all day, so we had to put the clue outside. It sucked that they opened, because everyone went inside and missed the note outside. Sorry, but it wasn't really our fault.

3. The ending was supposed to be better. However, acres of poison ivy had grown in between the time when I scouted the location and the actual day of the hunt, so after going down to plant the box (which actually ened up being a few minutes after Slytherin got there, because we had to turn around to replace the missing clues at 1st Lutheran which turned out to not actually be missing) we had to immediately leave so Mattson could take ashower due to his near-deathly allergic reaction to poison ivy. Sorry about that too.

4. I don't know what the "half-hour check-ins" were that you're talking about, but I remember no such thing. And honestly, we wouldn't have had time for any such thing. We were pretty much busy the entire time running around checking on supposedly (and one actually) missing clues and doing some last-minute preparation. Admittedly, I guess the time we spent filling up balloons for the personalised water-balloon strikes could have been devoted to this, but I think water balloons were better.

In conclusion: I guess everyone had a good time, but honestly doing it just made me (and JM) feel like absolute shit. We spent an incredible amount of time planning and preparing this, and then on the day of the only contact we had with people was calls from them yelling at us for screwing shit up. After how miuch time we spent, it just seemed like everyone was ungrateful (I realise this was probably not the case, but it's just how it seemed to us). I really enjoyed planning the clues (and planting them was fun too), but executing it was just such an unenjoyable time for us. I would really like to plan another one (and we still have a lot of really great ideas that didn't get used in this one due to time constraints and other circumstances) but if the experience of running it would be the same, I just don't really think I want to.

(EDIT: After reading some people's responses to it, I can see that they really did enjoy it, and I guess I don't feel so bad about it now.)

Oh Blog Where Art Thou?

Maybe you've noticed...

our blog has been dying lately. and none of us know why.

so, for now...LADIES AND GENTLEMEN...i can promise you an exciting 15000 party is on the horizon! it will be the most arrogant/pointless film of your life...and you will enjoy it.

this mustache is off to work. adios.

It's Rated Arrrr

This post is intended for my fellow treasure hunters. Sorry, everybody else.

Max is rather down. Ravenclaw placed 3rd out of four in the scavenger hunt, and the fourth team quit after their captain had to leave. So, we lost big time. Now I'm tired and dirty and disappointed, mostly in myself. Plus, I had to go to friggin' marching band practice and missed out on post-hunt fun time. Goddamnit. But, moving on:

Thoughts on the scavenger hunt: The clues were better this time around. I was a big fan of the bluebirds, the pamphlet map, and the picture sequences. The Brekken's clue was pretty weak, but other than that the clues were reasonably straightforward. I don't understand how we screwed up the church one, but that was all our fault. Sam and Josh, you guys wrote good clues and got this thing together and for that I thank you. But...

What was lacking this time around was the structure and the human touch.

Structure: We ran into other teams way too often. Several clues seemed to just lead every team to the same place. The little collisions were fun sometimes (mostly because we got to give them the finger and spit at them and stuff) but mostly they were a distraction. We had to worry more about how we would find the clue without alerting the other team to where the clues were. Also, it kind of breaks some of the magic of the treasure hunt when you end up searching the same place for 20-30 minutes with another team right there with you.

The human touch ("warm fuzzies"): Our only personal contact with the organizers was a single, poorly executed water-balloon ambush. The half hour check ins worked well last time to make sure everybody was on track and provided ample material for post-hunt analysis. Speaking of post-hunt, the ending was disappointing. We figured out the clue, ran all the way down that buggy, muddy path, ran over to the red flag, looked in the box...and found a small note reading "sorry, too late." What a terrible way to end a scavenger hunt! I'm sure the other, earlier finishers were a little more excited, but it would have been nice to at least have had some people there to say "good job, dudes." Hell, we did that for everybody last time.

Next scavenger hunt: Pammy and I (and perhaps others?) will be planning this one, probably to be held sometime in late July. What works for everyone? I generally work thursday, friday, and sunday, anywhere July 17-19 or 24-26 works great for me. Or a saturday time, or a possible tie-in with Pammy's grad party if people have already planned for that? All interested parties, please leave comments. We'll try to set a date as soon as possible.

Say, here's a concept. How about for the next one, each team will have 20 minutes to figure out a clue and find the next one. After this time, they can call the organizers and get the answer. This will prevent 40 minute hang-ups that waste time and drain morale, and it will get this motherfucker moving. Or is 20 minutes too long, or too short? Perhaps we could estimate a time for each clue and include that number with the clue. Longer times for harder clues, less for what we think will be easy. Also, I think it would be good to have at least 4 per team, and also have a way to track the teams' progress. Personal logs? Video diaries? We shall see.

Oh man, I'm already starting to get excited about the next scavenger hunt. Good times.